As mentioned in this week’s Tune Tuesday, my best friend and I went to see Simple Plan last Saturday. Simple Plan was a big part of my life when I was about 11 or 12 years-old. So, in keeping with the theme of the old days, I’m dedicating this week’s Fuck It Friday to my young and embarrassing self. That’s right friends, I’m going to be sharing some of my most embarrassing photos from my childhood. Now, I’m going to save the baby and toddler photos for another day because frankly, they’re not that embarrassing. I was a cute ass child.
What I’m going to be showing you is the beginning of my time on social media. These are the images that I had posted on my Myspace or my Tumblr when I was a stupid kid who had no idea how the internet works. Without further ado, here are some of my “best” moments.
I figure we might as well start with one of the worst ones right out the gate. As a younger kid, I was really obsessed with trying to be super deep and sounding so romantic. This is a prime example of that garbage. And, this was the height of text on images. God only knows what I was thinking when I put this together. If I remember correctly, the text on this moved, which I think makes it even more special. That combined with those stunna shades, that tweed pageboy hat and my signature too cool to smile so let me look disgusted face (one that I still make quite often) I give this image a 10/10 on the embarrassment scale.
Next, we have another beautiful text piece dating back from my myspace era. It seems like I’ve heightened the contrast and the decreased the brightness (I still do to all of my photos). Looking off camera was trendy for whatever reason. I don’t know. It’s awful, I know. Oh my god, and this was the era of myspace/scene names. If you don’t know what that it, I don’t even think I could explain it to you. I guess we were all obsessed with finding our own identity and alliteration that we just made it a thing. Now, before I was Emily Starz (which I later turned into Emilyinthestars. That’s the beautiful evolution of my brand), I tried to be EmilyEverything. I don’t even know why. I think before that, it was Emmy/EmilyEnthusiasm but thankfully I can’t find any of those images, yikes. And what is up with those stickers? I get the cute little dino because that’s the epitome of scene/emo but the duck? I also vaguely remember making this on photobucket, which is a super throwback in itself. I’ll give this a 7/10 on the embarrassment scale. I mean, the photo itself isn’t awful (in fact, I’d probably upload something like this today) but the editing and text is what really kills me.
This image marks the height of my emo phase, holy cow. Look at me. Look at my precious little baby emo face. This was pre-cellphone days for me. I don’t know why I had a camera but no phone? Since I didn’t have a phone, I used to just go to my local park and meet up with my friends. No calls. No text. No confirmation that we were all meeting there. I just had to trust that they were going to be there like always. But on this particular day, I couldn’t find a single one of them, which I guess meant that I needed a photoshoot (yes, there are a hundred more photos from this set). You can’t see it but I’m wearing a shirt that advertised the musical I was in when I was in like 8th grade. It’s kinda hard to look emo with an Annie shirt on. I think what puts this over the top is that pose, man. Look at me. I am perfectly conveying that “I’m deep and brooding so put me in your top 8” vibe. 6/10.
I wanna believe that this image is a lot older than it actually is but I know for a fact that it’s not. In those other photo’s I was anywhere between 11 and 13-years-old. Here, I’m probably 15 or 16. I should have known better. I should have evolved by then. But I didn’t. If anything, I think I went backward and got worse. I don’t understand why I thought it was okay to lighten the photo to the point where I barely have any features. I was literally out of control and I don’t understand why no one stopped me. And what is that pose? It’s the worst and I’m STILL MAKING THE SAME FACE AS I DO NOW. Jeez. 7/10 would not recommend.
And for the grand finale…
THIS IS BY FAR THE WORST.
What are those poses? Why was I in the bathtub (which everyone thought was so cool at the time)? I really want to know what was going through my mind when all of these photos were taken. Who did I think I was? I just can’t get over this. This photo set takes the cake. 100/10 would not recommend. Would not be this child’s friend.
I wonder if I’m going to feel this way about my current photos when I look back at them.
Here’s to growing up!
As an added bonus, I’m going to show you my Myspace about me from some years ago. This was a perfect indication of who I was back in the day. I am not proud of myself.
Welp, that’s it for this week’s fuck it Friday. Tweet me some of your most embarrassing photos @emilyinthestars at and I’ll catch you next week!
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